Any prayer warriors out there? We could use all the help we can get right now. If you don't pray, I welcome positive thoughts. It all helps.
I haven't blogged lately, because I'd have to blog every 5 minutes just to keep current with my emotions and thoughts.
We are about 24 hrs. away from getting our son into a 90 day inpatient recovery center and I can tell it's going to be hell right up to the last second. Sometimes he's so compliant and other times the addict behavior is right in my face. Son thinks he's hiding it, but he's not.
Husband and I just want to get him into treatment. We understand that it's just the beginning and it doesn't mean life will be great. But, after having son home for a week now- we need him in recovery FOR US. We need normalcy again. Even if it's short lived. We need a few nights of sleep, that's all we want right now.
I was filled with sadness, worry and fear when son was "on the streets," when they are back home with you (and not recovered) that sadness turns to anger. I understand Dad's (from Mom and Dad's Blog) anger much better now. I'm allowing myself to feel the anger and move on. Our son is still thinking with his addict brain and we'd be foolish to think he's even capable of thinking straight right now.
My prayers are that we get him safely to rehab. Then, my prayers will be that a miracle takes place within those 90 days and something will sink in...
Thank you for reading.
4 months ago
We need breaks too. I know the pain you are feeling. It's is OK to get really angry, anger is actually a healty emotion as long as you can look back and learn from it, just like anything else.
ReplyDeleteThere is no happy spot as long as they are using. There can only be hope. I have said it many times, you are winning. He is alive. And he going to a place to get help. Addiction is a fatal affliction that has an ultimate goal to kill the addict. Every single day your son is alive you have won a victory. It can only be your son's victory if he choses to stop. Your reward is another day of LIFE.
Hang in there. I am thinking of you and your son. I hope you are able to get him in there successfully. It is so difficult when dealing with addicts. There reality is not ours.
ReplyDeleteLast night, my husband and I held each other in bed. We both agree that our relationship has suffered, because my addict son lives with us and we worry about him. I'm with you, right now. Husband and I need a reprieve from this,where we can focus on our marriage. You've got my prayers, my friend. 100%. I've been where you are, and it looks like I'm back there again. Please email or call me privately. We should hold hands and pray together-- two moms united who understand one another.
ReplyDeleteDebby
i hope he makes it to rehab and starts working a program, i hope you see it is his addiction and get some detachment, though i am going through some tough issues with detachment of my girl myself right now. i am grateful for your blog, i am grateful your son has a wonderful loving set of parents who care so much about him.
ReplyDeleteSo many emotions in so few words. You are doing all the right things today, the rest is between your son and God. I will pray for a miracle...because I see them happen every day!
ReplyDeleteHave been praying for your boy, along with mine, and will keep at it. Its really all we can do sometimes.
ReplyDeleteI hope that your son gets help and understands that this is a life line that he has been tossed. I hope that you get some relief too.
ReplyDeleteI will pray. God is good. My daughter has spent a significant time in and out of rehabs. Each rehab has made a difference in her life. Each day of broken dreams changes her. She is heading toward a drug-free life in her own time. Your blog so clearly describes the life of a person who loves an addict. God bless you.
ReplyDeleteI feel your pain. My daughter is 29 years old. She is a substance abuser and bulimic. She recently gave up rights to her kids for us to adopt them. It seems that this life style that she wants is more important to her. I will pray for you. Don't hold in the anger and other emotions. Don't blame yourself. Rememer the One who is really in charge and cling to Him.
ReplyDelete1st off let me say Thank you for becoming a follower of my blog and then let me say I am sorry I haven't gotten by until today. I have been super busy lately. 3rd I want you to know I said a prayer for you and your son. What an amazing job you are doing.
ReplyDeleteCheri
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