Inspirational Prayer of the Day

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

30 days left

30 days left of my son's 90 day program. Yikes. I know he's working on his exit plan, and I know that I don't have control over what that entails. I'm just hoping that he decides to stay down there a bit longer, or go out of state where we have extended family. Those are my hopes, but this is his recovery. We'll see...

Son was chosen to go on a weekend retreat at the owner's cabin in the mountains, last weekend. Not everyone gets to go during their stay in treatment, it's definitely a privilege, and he earned it.

I felt depressed last week. It's sad that I can't be completely overjoyed with his progress. I am joyful and ever so thankful for his sobriety thus far. But, it saddens me that I have to forever remain cautiously optimistic. I feel like if I talk about how great he's doing, it'll bite me in the butt and he'll relapse. I know that part is twisted thinking- I can't really "jinx" his sobriety. Yet these feelings creep up. I guess I'm still working on finding that balance. Guess it means I have to continue working on myself.

I do have a lot to be thankful for in my life, and I need to just focus on those positive things. Which includes my son's sobriety, for today.

8 comments:

  1. We have all felt that way from time to time. As twisted as it may seem it is actually pretty standard. We know deep down that it's not about us, but there is still that feeling nagging at us. I am so happy that your son is doing so well. I am sending you all my prayers that it stays that way.

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  2. I just remember that I am powerless over others. They have their own HP and I'm not it. I too am glad that your son is doing well. Prayers for him and for you.

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  3. Talking about it is the key -- you have to get it out. It's only normal that this situation is getting you down. Just know you have friends here to lean on.
    Hugs,
    Sue

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  4. I pray he finds a recovery group when he leaves the program. He will be in recovery for a life time.

    God bless you! I so know what you are going through, I pray someone can get my son into a program before it is too late.

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  5. It is for his benefit to complete a drug rehab program. Getting off drugs could be one of the hardest things that he would have to do it his life, but it will pay off

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  6. Just wanted to come check in with you.
    My blog has just been growing like a crazy weed and I haven't been able to get by for as many visits. I miss all my blog friends.
    Come for a visit and see both of my new parties for the week. They are up every week and I hope you will participate.

    Cheri
    Its So Very Cheri

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  7. I remember those days. My son is three years sober now, and I am beginning to feel a measure of peace. Yes, the doubts still nibble at my heart from time to time, but it's getting easier to trust.

    Praying for your son and your family,
    Cheri

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  8. I can't tell you how often I have worried about "jinxing" my son's sobriety (which to be honest, I have no idea how long he's ever gone since he hid it from me and lied about it so often). I know that cautiously optimistic feeling too, its so annoying isn't it!? We want to jump for joy at the progress but know all too well that the next day we could be crumpled up in a ball crying on the bed. I'm with you. And I am hopeful.

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