Oh gosh. Our son left rehab yesterday afternoon and we don't know where he is. It's amazing how strong you can feel and all the work you can do, and in one split second all the old feelings and worries come back.
Apparently he was drinking, denied it at first, but then admitted it. The reason he told them he was leaving is that he didn't want to start back at square one. He had 140 days in rehab, with a relapse at day 85 and now again. He's obviously struggling with sobriety.
As his parents, we could sense something- restlessness? Maybe just the desire to use was getting stronger for him. Knowing his personality, we believed it was boredom setting in, as they have no physical outlet/exercise at his rehab and his job search entailed taking the bus downtown and walking up and down the same main street applying for jobs. That alone sounds depressing to me.
He knows one person down there (he's 6 hrs. south of where we live)and that person is someone who went through the same rehab, but is now living on his own and I believe using- as he was involved in my son's earlier relapse. I've called and left a message with that person asking him to please call if knows where our son is.
I just want to hear his voice. I just pray he doesn't use to the point of overdosing. I'm just scared. I know this is his recovery, his journey, I know I can't make him get and stay sober, I know I'm powerless. But, I also know that for today, I'm a worried sick mother.
If you pray, please pray for my son and his safety. Thank you so very much...
5 months ago
I just prayed for the safety of your son and for him to contact you....my thoughts and prayers are with you!
ReplyDeleteAddiction is heartbreaking. Prayer is the only real power we possess. I pray for your son and for you.
ReplyDeletePG
I am praying for your son and for you. We are in California together, and I am here if you need to speak. I know the pain you are feeling, regardless of the strength you have gained during this process. My son has gone through four (4) formal rehabs and has relapsed every time. He is currently in an in-patient program right now, but there are no guarantees.
ReplyDeleteHang in there...I had someone recently tell me that the addicts in the world are often the most resourceful group of people she knows. It is amazing how they manage, when we can't imagine it. My thoughts and prayers are with you. He will be okay and you will hear from him when he is ready. I pray it is soon.
Thank you Sherry, PG, & Lisa~ I appreciate your prayers and comments. Our son called, so at least we know he's alive. I'll start a new post.
ReplyDeleteYou and your son are in my prayers.
ReplyDeleteI will def pray for you and your son.
ReplyDeleteYou know what? I am going through certain things myself and I never thought how much I would be hurting my parents. I feel really bad for it now. I wish I had parents who were as supportive or me, who could think more about them
but, your son will be fine. I am praying.