Tuesday, December 22, 2009


I hesitate to blog, but I'm going to anyway.

My son came home last night! His voice on the phone is always music to my ears and hugging him is even better- I'm sorry but I just can't help but love on him. I stand 5'9", but my hubby and sons are all 6'3-ish. They all hug good and I feel like everything is right in the world while in their arms.

My son wants to "try and do the right thing again." I know he wants help, I hear it in his voice and see it in his eyes. BUT......... I also know the pull of addiction. We've been down this road before. He'll be great for about 4 days, then things will get too rough for him (cravings) and he'll most likely bolt.

The difference this time is I'm not trying to fix him, I'm not worried that what I say or don't say will influence his sobriety. I don't feel that panic. I'm just enjoying these few days with him, however long they will last. We are going up to our cabin for Christmas, so he'll be with us for a week, but once we return back here he may just take off again.

Thank you all so much for your comments. Here's hoping we all have a magical Christmas and a most blessed New Year with lots of great things to come for us and our loved ones.


  1. An early Christmas gift! I am so glad to hear he is there with you and will be at your cabin for the holiday week. I'll be thinking and praying for your family. I hate that tentative feeling of "how long will this last" but it sounds like you are going to be able to shove that thought aside and enjoy your time...good for you!!! One of this times it really will be the last time and I hope this is it for your "boy" (I can relate to the hug thing!)

  2. I am so happy that he is home for Christmas. Maybe a week away will be enough to get him past the really rough stuff. I really admire the way you are able to focus on the love and you don't seem to carry any anger. I will keep you and your family in my prayers. Merry Christmas.


  3. Enjoy your Christmas with your family. Giving you your son for the holiday is truly a gift from God. Letting love fill your heart instead of anger and frustration and sadness seems exactly right this time of year.

  4. I posted but it didn't show? I just wanted to say I am in the same place you are at this moment, and I am also choosing to enjoy the time I can with my son over the holidays before he probably "bolts". Have a wonderful holiday at the Cabin, sounds lovely.

  5. Taking him to the cabin sounds like a good idea, he really has nowhere to bolt. I'm all in favor of "holding them hostage" for Christmas. Just enjoy these few days ahead with everything you got. Merry Christmas!

  6. I pray that he starts to realize that, when things get too rough for him, getting high triples the pain. You just never know what will produce that turning point. Your prayers make a difference.

  7. Enjoy your holiday at the cabin with your son. It should be a nice break for him, and nice for you have him with you. Hopefully being away from home helps you to "let go" too. I know it always does for me... Have a beautiful holiday :)

  8. I hope that you and your son have that magical Christmas. It sounds great to go to a cabin and enjoy Christmas. Enjoy him each day without the shadow of the future looming. Remember he has his own Higher Power.

  9. You have a great blog here. It's a very interesting read. I have a blog myself which provides inspiration and guidance to people all around the world. Life is hard enough, and I'm hoping for my blog to be a place where people can go to hear the words the words they need to hear in order to brighten up their day.

    I'd like to exchange links with you to help spread some traffic around. Please let me know if this is possible.


  10. I've been AWOL in blogger world, so I'm just now reading this! Amen!! What a lovely gift, to have you son home with you again.
    I have faith that you will have faith-- and that you will not get lost in expectations. Good for you for accepting that you cannot change him.
    I pray for you, and your family, that your time together will be blessed.
    Hope to see you again soon-- for garbanzo bean salad!


  11. I hope you have a wonderful time together and that you will be able to relax and just enjoy the time together. Praying for complete healing.