Hard to believe it's been almost a month since I last blogged. Once again, all of your comments were very meaningful to me and they gave me the strength I needed. I so appreciate all of you.
I've been doing a lot of reflecting this month. I now realize how high my expectations were for my son- that was evident in my feelings when he relapsed. I've been working on having hope, but not expectations. Sometimes it feels like a gray area, but I think I'm getting it... I also had to deal with my anger- that one surprised me- but it did surface. My roller coaster of emotions after his relapse proved to me how co-dependent I still am. I have not fully detached. I'm still a work in progress!
Son's house manager said he was going to be more hands on with our son. He said that they all let their guard down because he was doing so well. This is not to blame them whatsoever, but I liked hearing that they'll be more hands on with him. Son has chosen to stay there for another 90 days, which we are very thankful for! I'd like to see it stretched to a year, if possible. I just think with his age, the longer in recovery the better.
We get to see our son this Sunday. It's been 10 weeks since we've seen him. His 30 days aren't quite up, but they made an exception as they feel we are important to his recovery. My husband has been writing son a letter almost every single night. I think it's good therapy for my husband and we've been told that son lights up from all the mail he gets.
I thank God for how He continues to work in my life. His grace amazes me!
1 week ago